I have tried to approach this post with intention, with thought, and with preparation countless times. And I am no closer to achieving my goal.
So, I am going to do what I always do: say UH UH and do it off the cuff.
I was mildly bothered by this for a while, but I just had a long chat with a fellow writer about our processes and he asked me why I wanted to change my writing style. It’s a good question, and one that I don’t really have a great answer for. I just like change.
But the change for changes sake, that produces nothing of benefit is a redundant change. It reminds me of my time in the public service, but more on that later.
I was stonewalling myself in an effort to do things in the manner that others say works for them, or is best, or whatever.
Which is entirely off-course for my usual approach. The Nick Approach to Life. Stumble, fuck it up, figure it out, hit publish, correct a mistake later (or don’t).
Ah, there it is. The thread I was looking for: and it’s all about doing things as and when you want, how you want, and leaning into what your community can do to support you when you’re feeling stuck.
Another thing that came up in this discussion was about a general underpinning component of my life philosophy: do whatever you want, as long as it’s not causing harm to anyone else.
This is an obvious one, to me, but I think what I need to talk more about today is its shadow counterpart: don’t do anything that you do or don’t want to do, if you think it will cause harm to anyone.
This is a two-stage process: recognising when the things that your emotions or appetites are calling for, and identifying if someone is going to be harmed in the execution of it and therefore abstaining from it is the first.
The second is recognising when something is being requested of you from another person, identifying the same, and still abstaining from it.
Why hello topic of self-employment, I’ve been waiting to invite you to the party, step on it.
The importance of the first half of this process should be obvious: if you want something, but it’s going to cause harm to someone, don’t be greedy. Recognise it and calm the fuck down. But the second one is where the dreaded C word comes into play.
No, not that one. Although in the context of employment, both can be appropriate, but I’m talking about Compromise.
If you have a boss, and they make a fair and reasonable request in the official view of the company, but this same request is going to directly harm someone through your efforts, there’s no doubt that you don’t want to do it.
And you don’t have to do it.
Maybe I’m being idealistic, but if everybody rolled the clock back on all the compromises they’ve made in this vein, perhaps we’d return to a point of total self-accountability and the person who wants to retrench the 62-year-old because the 20-year-old is faster will have to do it themselves.
Of course, it won’t reverse the upset that the 62-year-old feels, but at least the psychological responsibility of the action won’t fall on the middle manager who is going to lose sleep for weeks because they know they’ve ripped the floor out from under this person who thought they had a few more years in the game.
I didn’t pull this card out often in my career, but it definitely happened. The details are hazy, but as I remember it the client had a pretty shit situation and my boss said ‘OK, tell them this and give them this outcome’ and I said ‘I’m not going to do that. I don’t agree with that decision and I’m not going to deliver that decision.’
I didn’t get fired, but it sowed a mild seed of discontent, I’m sure.
Just how many of these actions (‘microaggressions’ lol) do we make as employees? The profits of large organisations are typically built on the backs of the little guy, and I don’t think reversing that overnight is the smartest thing to do, but if the people working in the organisations took personal accountability perhaps the profits would be smaller, and the backs of the little guys would be less crushed.
There is an illusion at play here, and it’s all about safety.
I have a full-time job, and because I show up every day, my job, and therefore my security, is safe.
Until a financial shock hits the economy and my entire department is made redundant.
Or I turn 60 and that 20-year-old (that reminds me oh so much of me, 40 years ago) is knocking on the door and before I know it, I’m on my ass.
There is no safety when you are working for someone else. You are entirely dependent on the whims of the other people, the company, The Man. (Cue the calls of ‘smash the patriarchy’ here)
Enter self-employment. Now you’re entirely dependent on the whims of you.
That means you’re going to have the best and worst boss at the same time. You’re going to have to push yourself far harder than you would like to, but you’re also responsible for ensuring that you get a good night’s sleep each night.
If your bank is full but your sleep tank is running on empty, you’re making mistakes, and you need to catch the correction before it’s too late.
There’s no reason to be rich and burnt out. Better to be healthy, safe, and happy, than to watch time pass on your golden Rolex from the comfort of your king-size bed while you remain perfectly incapable of facing the light of day.
This brings me to the next illusion: what we need versus what we think we need.
If you got a corporate job in your early 20s and stayed the course, progressing as most people do, by your mid-30s (assuming you’re in the private sector and you’re trying to do more than the bare minimum) there’s a good chance you’re pushing 6 figures.
And if you’ve followed the thread of consumption that snags people living that lifestyle, you’ve probably grown used to dropping at least 70% of it on ‘necessary expenses’.
If you gave $70k to a healthy monk or a nomad, you can be damn sure they’d go 5 years living well (conservative estimate)!
It’s not that this lifestyle is wrong, but there is a hugely powerful illusion at play that says What You See Is All There Is. Everyone around you has these bills, everyone around you has these lifestyles, therefore these are the only lifestyles that exist.
But it’s bulllllllshit!
There are people who spend 3 months of every year walking goats up a mountain.
There are people who spend months simply sitting in meditation.
There are people who live in self-sustaining communities and make a village trip once a month for necessary supplies. And I’m guessing they aren’t worried about running out of toilet paper when the newspapers scream ‘toilet paper shortage’, but I digress.
You don’t have to be these people, but you don’t have to be the person you are today either. It’s always a choice.
And the choice to be fully responsible for your life, to be self-employed not just in the work sense but in the sense of your entire life, takes away all excuses and gives you that sweet, terrifying thing that so many people crave but are deeply afraid of.
FREEDOM.
Freedom means having ultimate responsibility for each and every decision in your life. Where does your next meal come from? Where will you sleep? What will you do in the future?
Having a full-time job with a salary doesn’t answer these questions for you, it outsources their answer. ‘Oh, my company is taking care of it’. Cool, except they won’t forever, and then you’re back to having to answer those questions for yourself, only you don’t have as much experience as those that’ve been doing it for years.
The other thing that is occurring in lockstep with these illusions is the scarcity mindset starts to slip in. People become worried about all they have, and that they’re going to lose it. They start to distrust others, they become isolated, and slowly but surely, they lose their humanity.
I’ve seen far greater hospitality in poor countries than in rich countries. Rich people are so worried about all they have to lose, while poor people are happy to share what they have.
Think about that for a second. The poor person is excited to share what little they have, while the rich person is afraid to lose even a little of what they have.
This is the future we all need to be aware of. This is the reason we need to be holding ourselves to a higher standard. This is why we need to be applying a self-employed mindset to our lives today, not later.
You can always lose your job, but if you’ve made your life’s purpose to do whatever the fuck you want, as long as it doesn’t harm others, there’s a good chance you’ve found out that you can also help others WHILE DOING SOMETHING THAT YOU WANT.
And when you discover this thing, you can move into self-employment because you’ve found Your Thing.
That thing should take more and more of your time, and soon enough you’ll be ready for total self-employment because your unique skills and personality will always be needed.
Your job at the bank can be outsourced to AI in the blink of an eye. And if it isn’t AI, it’ll be the fast, fit, overenthusiastic 20-year-old, or a restructuring.
We all need to learn to be more robust. And we all have something to offer.
Find out what it is and start offering it.
And if you don’t know yet what it is, start saying no to what it’s not. Work backwards. You’ll find it soon enough, and the world will sing for you.
Humanity is the hottest look in 2024, mark my words!
Thanks for joining in on this turbulent little Nick Lets Rip. I want to publish more regularly again, so you’ll be hearing from me soon.
Much love and catch y’all soon!
(Cat in a box. Hiddenly)